Monday, April 20, 2009

Self Portrait #2 (An Afterthought)

I was so infatuated with the last picture I shared that I had to share more.
Pam D suggested I compile my self portraits and show them off.
So, I swooned skimmed through my masterpieces snapshots and threw together a collage of the magnificence that is me random shots. 25 to be exact! There's a couple neat ones in here to point out.

  • 4th row down in the middle was taken just hours before I found out I was PG with the OC!
  • The 5 red pictures (four corners and middle) were taken at 33 weeks prego when I was in desperate need of being convinced I hadn't magically transformed into a giant troll-like hippo overnight a wide load sign an epidural a tequila shot reassurance that Pregnant is still Beautiful!!
  • Middle row, 4th column is the inspiration for this sites header.
  • The oldest picture is bottom row, 2nd column. It's PRE-OC!

And just for good measure because I couldn't resist one more fabulous look at myself I thought I'd show off my new shirt. $4.99 at my favorite store (for those of you that don't know... that would be SEARS!) Unfortunately, since I'm utterly stunning in every way I ended up with a shot that showed off my boobs didn't show off my shirt. On the up side, it turned out to be a wonderful portrait. Glasses, no makeup, and worn all day hair!! DAMN I'M SEXY

And in case you needed more reason to famn over my fabulousness think this is a great picture...

This is after 3 hours sleep, 6 hours of pretending to work work, and an hour of having a neurologist electrocute and stab me (wish I could strike that part out)!!! Thus the new shirt... it's my reward for not screaming too loudly crying like a baby as I had needles poked in my muscles. I swear, the doctor literally said, "I like doing this test. I'd never let anyone do it to me, but I like doing it!" (NO JOKE!) At which point I called her a masochist and she laughed. It sounded strangely like "MUAHAHAHAHA!!"

I swear if the crazy Indian Anti-Christ woman had opened her caftan, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse would have rode out in a plague of locusts! At least she had a sense of humor. How crappy would it be to get stabbed by an expressionless ass with no emotion?

So, while I spend the rest of my evening licking my wounds running around the house in nothing but my new shirt, I hope the rest of you had a better Monday than me.

NOTE: Good news is there is absolutely nothing wrong with me! Okay, well there are a lot of things WRONG with me... but nothing that can be diagnosed by MRI (I learned I'm not clausterphobic), EEG (Yes, there is actual brain function up there), EMG or blood work. Unfortunately, that still leaves me with what has now been labeled "benign twitching" all over my body. ANNOYING to say the very least!



13 comments:

The Queen said...

Well the other 34 members of our gene pool refer to it as booze DTs, but if you want to be special..and refer to your shaking and twitching as...."benign twitching" ..You go right ahead.. since you are a Princess..

Listen to your Mother here,, there is nothing wrong with you that a strong Salty Dog won't cure...

but,, I've only been in this gene pool for 51 years.. so what the hell do I know!

The Queen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pam D said...

I think I came here with a comment, but after reading the one above me, which apparently was written by your mother, I a) am laughing too hard to even REMEMBER what I was going to write, and b) certainly can see where you got your hysterically fabulous sense of humor!
Oh, I remember what I was going to say now. (Lord, thank you for small mercies). I really was hoping that you'd make a collage, but I am crackin' UP at how many pics you have! That is awesome! I honestly wish that I didn't avoid my reflection or having my picture taken; if I tried to do a collage like that, I'd have one picture of me with bunny ears and then white space. Nice. !!!

McKay Family said...

Thanks for the visit and comment! Love the collage and your sense of humor. I might try taking more self-portraits now...it really isn't all that bad. And yes, I get many unflattering angles, but I am flattered by your comment. Thanks!

Kricia Morris Photography said...

Super cute entry! Thanks for the blog love...I HATE having my picture taken so this week was rough for me! lol

aspiritofsimplicity said...

I love all the self-portraits! What fun.

Anonymous said...

You're hillarious! I loved your photo, and yes, a fellow pigmant-challanged girl, I am!

Victoria Findlay Wolfe said...

Hilarious! how to type when holding in my belly laughs...

Allison Claire said...

Wow, thank you so much for your comments, I loved your post and your pictures are great. You are gorgeous! You are also very funny. :)

Unknown said...

You are hilarious! I love your story! Great picture

Granny Nanny said...

Oh, nice picture, i like that...simply yet very elegant..good job!

MrsW said...

I need a dikshunarry.

Salty Dog (noun) a slang phrase with several meanings, including "an experienced sailor" and "a libidinous man"Can I have one too? Will it cure what ails me?

Nice collage btw.

MrsW said...

In the absence of a randy sailor I guess GIN would do the trick nicely.

I have the ingredients. Tomorrow might (yet again) not be Friday but I feel a Salty Dog could be appropriate... Thursday is almost Friday after all.

I know my Mum is going to just love this concoction.

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