tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-77487821827742324662024-03-12T23:15:27.855-05:00One More Fairy Tale (resigned)Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.comBlogger186125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-41752255755451412792009-09-29T18:07:00.001-05:002009-09-29T18:10:08.374-05:00Visit the New Site<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div style="text-align: left;">Like I mentioned before (I think)... in order to fix some of the codex problems that have come with the many layout changes here... I had to change the site address. Please be sure to update your links to <a href="http://heretherebedreams.blogspot.com/">heretherebedreams.blogspot.com</a> as I will eventually stop updating on this site.<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Also, readers seem to come and go with time (an blog-lapses)... so in order to get on the new blogroll please visit the new site <a href="http://heretherebedreams.blogspot.com/">HERE</a> and leave a comment. While you will remain on the blogroll here... Only those loyal (aka. bored) enough to journey to the new palace will have a spot on the new blogroll.<br />
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</div><div style="text-align: left;">I *HEART* you all dearly and hope you will <a href="http://heretherebedreams.blogspot.com/">visit me</a> once again.<br />
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</div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://heretherebedreams.blogspot.com/2009/09/times-are-hard-christmas-shouldnt-be.html">NEW POST</a>:<br />
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</div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" style="background: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px;" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img border="0" height="71" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" style="height: 71px; width: 75px;" width="75" /></a> <br />
</div>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-5169837205466814042009-09-27T02:35:00.003-05:002009-09-27T02:42:13.827-05:00If You Are Reading This...You know that I have not died... only caved under the pressures of life. <div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left">But much too your enjoyment (or if you're related to me... dismay!)</div><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left">I have plans to be back in full force... soon... I think...</div><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left">And in honor of that... I totally didn't listen to any of you and created a whole new idea for a blog design. I think you'll like it! (I hope you like it)</div><br /><div align="left"></div><div align="left">I tried to add a picture to show just what I'm talking about... but blogger doesn't like my "YOU LIVE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE" internet speed... so pictures will come another day when it isn't almost 3 in the morning.</div><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left">Oh... so you want to see it do you?</div><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left">I'd ask you to beg... but I think you've waited patiently long enough.</div><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left">But you have to keep in mind that it's not completely finished. I have some awesome plans for new additions on the blog-palace!</div><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left">Check it out... and leave a comment so I make sure you get into the new blogroll!! (you can do it... even if it's just *flipping you the middle finger*... I can accept that!... but comment so I can flip you one in return!)</div><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left"></div><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 150px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://i733.photobucket.com/albums/ww339/Princess_Designs/OneMoreFairyTale/blinkie2.gif" /> <div align="center"><a href="http://heretherebedreams.blogspot.com/">http://heretherebedreams.blogspot.com/</a></div><br /><p align="center"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a></p><div align="right"><a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><br /><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-61114255867552689812009-06-28T02:33:00.004-05:002009-06-28T03:27:48.513-05:00VOTE on new design!!<em>*Warning... it's 2 am... I've spent 3 weeks trying to find/being out bid/falling in love/getting the contract on a house/getting nervous because the move will involve changing jobs. So after I read this, I noted several typos... deal with it. I've fixed what I remembered seeing, but I know there are more. You're <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">intelligent</span> individuals and I have no doubt you can decipher my meaning. I promise to be more diligent in the future, but tonight, my give a d*** is busted!</em><br /><br />So... with the folks moving to the kingdom on Tuesday and having jumped for joy at the fact that our offer was accepted Friday on "The Princess's Dream Palace" in the middle of <s>Who The Hell Lives in Bum F*** Egypt?</s> Nowhere!! (see me jumping for joy?!?!) The whole blogger world is put on hold.<br /><br />But that's just an excuse. The truth is... I've had the new blog palace near completion for a week now. The problem is... I'm indecisive!! (Give me a break!! I was saving all my decisiveness for the house-buying procedure and now I'm sapped!)<br /><br />So here's your chance. I know... I've totally slacked off on blogging and you've all lost total and utter faith in me (i.e. I've been replaced by the cute <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">blond</span> down the street!)<br /><br />BUT... I'm hoping that not all my readers have <s>packed there shit and kicked the dog on the way out the door</s> totally abandoned me.<br /><br />Because I now call upon you to summon the strength I do not have...<br /><br />Pick the new header (and therefore the entire design of the new site!)<br /><br />If you do not accept this challenge... or if there is a need for a tie breaker... I am simply going to feed the Ogre Child some chocolate and hand her a page with all three options. Whichever is covered in the most chocolate by the time she gets bored will be the winner.<br /><br />So here are the entries:<br /><br /><strong>The Original</strong><br />This was the first full length header I created for THIS site. The background color for the page could be<br />A) Dark Blue (shown)<br />B) <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Burgundy</span> (the darker red in the left side)<br />C) Orange (behind the castle)<br />D) Chocolate (The shirt)<br />E) Cream (the crown/text)<br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SkcdHI1qeDI/AAAAAAAABfM/_OHGC7YNJ9E/s1600-h/header.gif"><img style="WIDTH: 400px; HEIGHT: 216px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5352278690621978674" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SkcdHI1qeDI/AAAAAAAABfM/_OHGC7YNJ9E/s400/header.gif" /></a><br /><br /><strong>The Beach</strong><br />This header is the result of Summer Fever and thinking about sandcastles and <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">tequila</span> sunrises. The background colors could be:<br />A) teal/aqua (like the ocean)<br />B) grey (like the sky)<br />C) orange (like the drink/blanket)<br />D) sand (<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">ummm</span>... like the sand?)<br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SkcdN3kTWrI/AAAAAAAABfU/qHZspT0NMKY/s1600-h/header2.gif"><img style="WIDTH: 400px; HEIGHT: 167px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5352278806244842162" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SkcdN3kTWrI/AAAAAAAABfU/qHZspT0NMKY/s400/header2.gif" /></a><br /><br />Last but not least<br /><strong>Disney Castle</strong><br />This came about when I was searching castle pictures. It's a more cheery/colorful/make you puke "happy" header. The background colors could be:<br />A) Pastel Blue (do I need to describe it?)<br />B) Pastel Pink (again, where did I come up with this color?)<br />C) Pastel Yellow (I'm just grabbing at straws here)<br />D) Red (there's some in the flags and roses, but it does hurt most people's eyes)<br />E) Purple (Castle tops)<br />F) Green (there's grass down there)<br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SkcdT0sHY_I/AAAAAAAABfc/UqvSyFW1_lo/s1600-h/Header2.gif"><img style="WIDTH: 400px; HEIGHT: 143px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5352278908551521266" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SkcdT0sHY_I/AAAAAAAABfc/UqvSyFW1_lo/s400/Header2.gif" /></a><br /><br />So your mission is to leave a comment with your favorite header. I'd even accept "I hate them all, create something new!" And for extra credit... you make a background suggestion.<br /><br />The header with the most votes will be found on the new site VERY SOON <s>if I get my sh** together</s> If there is a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">definite</span> winner on background color, I'll do my best to make the color work... but I have the final say on that because sometimes they just don't look nearly as nice as you think they will.<br /><br />What do you get for your valued opinions?<br />(i.e. How do I get you to tell me what you think?)<br /><br />Why I'm bribing you of course!!<br /><br />Here's the deal...<br /><br /><p>If less than 10 people comment/vote...</p><ul><li>I will create a custom "I Voted" badge to post to your pages.</li></ul><p>If at least 10 people comment/vote...</p><ul><li>I will have the Ogre Child draw three names from a hat and award them a custom designed link badge for their website. I'll even install it if need be (sign in information required for installation)</li></ul><p>If at least 25 people comment/vote...</p><ul><li>I will award 1 lucky winner a custom designed header or stationary background design.</li><li>Plus 3 others will still <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">receive</span> a link badge.</li></ul><p>If you rock my world and make this the most popular post with 50 comment/votes...</p><ul><li>I will give a Grand Prize of either the custom header, or a gift basket of random <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">surprise</span> goodies (guaranteed to include some type of chocolate).</li><li>I will give the remaining header/basket (whichever isn't picked) to a 2<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">nd</span> place</li><li>Plus the 3 badges.</li></ul><p>Want more treats?</p><ul><li>Blog this with a link for an extra entry (you must vote first and you must tell me you blogged it) -- after all... we want to hit that 50 mark!!</li></ul><p>Stipulations?</p><ul><li>No more than 2 comments/blogger (one for the vote, one mentioning a blog post) will be counted to the comment/vote count. You know I have to put it in there so you silly fruit loops don't do this...</li><li>"I"</li><li>"think"</li><li>"you"</li><li>"should"</li><li>"use"</li><li>"the"</li><li>"Beach"</li><li>"header"</li><li>"with"</li><li>"a"</li><li>"sand"</li><li>"background"</li><li>"and"</li><li>"I"</li><li>"blogged"</li><li>"about"</li><li>"it"</li><li>"I"</li><li>"want"</li><li>"the"</li><li>"gift"</li><li>"basket"</li><li>"thanks"</li></ul><p>You know who you are *wink*</p><p>So get to voting... and send your friends to vote so I can mail someone a gift basket!!</p><p>Loves!!</p><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-43693460935462627942009-06-15T04:30:00.002-05:002009-06-15T04:42:45.575-05:00I haven't forgotten you<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Bear with me bloggies. </div><div align="left">I have not <s>been too drunk to blog</s> forsaken you. </div><div align="left">There is a greater plan in motion.</div><div align="left">For those of you who dare to stay with me through this lapse in blogging, I think you will find a fabulous surpirse lies just down the road.</div><div align="left">I am in the process of remodeling the castle.</div><div align="left">When <s>I get my poop in a group</s> the remodel is completed to my satisfaction, I will post a link to my new site (sorry, there are glitches on this one that for the life of me I cannot repair.)</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="left">The new site will include:</div><ul><li><div align="left">navigation menus</div></li><li><div align="left">interesting and fun pages for your entertainment</div></li><li><div align="left">a guest book (for those of you too busy to comment regularly)</div></li><li><div align="left">links to tutorials</div></li><li><div align="left">past posts from a previous blog that you may (or may not) be aware of</div></li><li><div align="left">a spectacular new layout</div></li><li><div align="left">and many more entertaining items</div></li></ul><p align="left">I must say, I believe I am pushing Blogger to it's limits. Since I <s>am clearly inept</s> do not understand the concept of CSS, this is a very complicated process for me. However, I believe that you will find <s>yourself in awe and amazement</s> it is all well worth the wait.</p><p align="left">Again, bear with me bloggies. I want to complete this project before we get hot and heavy into moving The Queen, purchasing our own home and the return of the school year. The process has hit a few bumps in the road because <s>I have a short attention span and am easily distracted by shiny objects</s> the contractors are idiots.</p><p align="left">Best Blogging to the Bloggies!</p><p align="left"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </p><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-55311096678250468472009-05-17T18:48:00.003-05:002009-05-17T19:03:35.069-05:00Gimme a Break!!<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">It's the last <s>productive</s> week of school. (Whoever thought it would be brilliant to come back to school for 2 days after Memorial Day should have their teeth kicked in!) Needless to say, "busy as a bee" will not even begin to describe it. So please excuse the lapse in blogisms while I try to <s>keep from pulling all of my hair out</s> attempt to assure the education of future generations.</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Last week I <s>tried to hide under my desk to skirt my duties</s> finished purchase orders for the classroom (huge thanks to co-workers who can spend an extra $100 in record time and others who can type up the forms when I'm totally tired of shopping on company funds!)</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Next weekend, we're throwing B-day party #2 at the bowling alley. Thankfully, that's Prince Charming's baby and I don't have to do SHIT!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Have I mentioned I'm behind on housework and every other household duty? Please don't look under my bed.</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">So forgive me for this horrible neglect to my blog. I'll be busy <s>reminding myself not to have more children</s> trying to help 5 kids pass Geometry, 3 pass English, 2 pass Art, and <s>kicking the asses of 15 others</s> hoping that everyone else will at least get through to their next grade level.</div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Bear with me. Summer <s>drinking fun</s> is coming soon and I'll definately have some great tales to tell!</div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Sun, Rays and Passing Grades!!</div><div align="left"><s><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><p></p><br /></s></s>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-2841364642417686532009-05-04T00:05:00.000-05:002009-05-04T01:25:32.541-05:00In case you thought I was lying!!<div align="center"><strong>Coconut Bra & Hula skirt to wear to your 40-yr-old Uncle's wedding... $10<br />Roll of film to catch that priceless moment... $2<br />Developing the photo of his beet red face... $0.50<br />Having him get revenge at YOUR wedding 5-years later!!! </strong></div><div align="center"><strong>PRICELESS!!**</strong></div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center">I knew you would never believe that Uncle <s>Auto</s> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Fucktard</span> was really in no position to be snubbing me at the wedding... so I stole the proof from my cousin (just in case he has the negatives <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">destroyed</span>!)</div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center"><em>((Of course I covered his face <s>to accentuate the obvious</s> to protect his true identity.))</em></div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center">As if it wouldn't be scary enough to be the bride when THIS guy walks into your ceremony.</div><div align="center"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5331840509217502498" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Sf6AsZ7ydSI/AAAAAAAABZY/8J-CNAcF3Cs/s400/ass1.gif" /></div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center">Imagine the horror to find out THIS is what he's wearing!!!</div><div align="center"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5331840446023867298" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Sf6AouhQG6I/AAAAAAAABZQ/CkphURbp2wc/s400/ass2.gif" /></div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center">And if you're curious... THIS is how the bride and groom react when he flashes them as they exit the ceremony!!</div><div align="center"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 251px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 206px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5331839597601339218" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Sf5_3V5jt1I/AAAAAAAABZI/a1X9OiKTJWA/s400/Untitled2.png" /></div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center">Now... if you're NOT married, you need to pick up your phone NOW and call to apologize for anything you may have done to ever <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">embarass</span> your family.</div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center">If you ARE married (not to my family), call your relatives and thank them for NOT being <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">WIERDOS</span>!!</div><div align="center"><p></p></div><div align="center"><em>**And in case you were wondering... yes... she did (only because it was too expensive to find a trailer full of flying pigs!)... so I guess she so deserved it!!</em></div><div align="center"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><div align="center"></div>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-58263379260693688332009-05-04T00:00:00.001-05:002009-05-04T01:25:07.730-05:00I ♥ Faces -- Week 17:Hats<center><a href="http://www.iheartfaces.com/"><img src="http://www.livinglocurto.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/125x125.jpg" /></a></center><center><p></center><center></center><center>Useless piece of information about me <s>you were dying to know</s></center><center><strong>I LOVE HATS!!</strong></center><center><p></center><center>Big <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">swooshy</span> sun hats, little berets, cute caps... you name it!</center><center>I think it's because <s>they cover my perpetually bad hair LIFE</s> they remind me of crowns. And we all know how I love all things crown-like!! <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">C'mon</span>, what do you expect from a PRINCESS?!?!</center><center><p></center><center>This week at I ♥ Faces the theme is... you guessed it <s>geniuses I tell you!</s> HATS!!</center><center><p></center><center>So I felt it very important to show off my FAVORITE hat! It's a fabulous pink with a gold band. Very crown-like if you ask me <s>which you didn't, but I don't care</s> I know it's a bit washed out, but what's a girl to do with a cheap camera and 3AM bathroom lighting? So here's my adult entry <em>--The <a href="http://ogrechild.blogspot.com/">O.C.</a> wanted to post her own entry (because <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Mommie</span> might screw up the story) so don't forget to check her <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">rock star</span> look if you haven't already!! --</em></center><center><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 246px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5331520629265007458" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Sf1dw8QCA2I/AAAAAAAABY4/bc_xanwTnEw/s400/hat.jpg" /> <p></center><center>Go on over and check out other people's hats at I ♥ Faces. I'm so going to <s>stalk them so I can steal their hats for myself</s> drool over the variety of hats they're showing off.</center><p align="center"><em>P.S. To all the fabulous visitors who commented on my last entry... I have so added a special blog roll just for you. So don't be surprised if you find me lurking around trying decide if I want to <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">permanently</span> stalk you!!</em> </p><p align="center"><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">NEED A SUPER LAUGH? DON'T FORGET TO CHECK OUT THE PICS IN MY NEXT POST!!</span></strong><br /><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </p><br /><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-44142539918625929562009-05-02T01:04:00.002-05:002009-05-02T02:15:28.287-05:00May Day! May Day!<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Okay, I think I'm finally <s>sober enough</s> feeling well enough to post. I know you are all just dying to know how my week went!! You didn't think the Queen was telling the truth did you? <s>tattle tale</s></div><div align="left"><s><p></s></p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Last Friday I looked at a house for the Queen and Dad. It's a pretty cool house and in case she hasn't noticed yet, I thought I'd mention <span style="font-size:130%;"><strong>the price has dropped</strong></span>. Needs some work, but <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">definitely</span> doable (the house, not my MOM!)</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">After that, I paid all the <s>past due</s> bills. Last thing I wanted was to get stuck out of the state with no insurance and no cell phone only to come home to no electricity. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Definitely</span> would have put me in a sour mood.</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Then, we loaded up the chariot and headed North to our motel. All appeared to be going well, until the INFESTATION!! That's right... the hotel put my parents in an ANT INFESTED ROOM (and they knew it!!) Go figure the whole hotel was filled. PC and I were willing to move upstairs to let the folks have our room. Just as we made this decision we noticed that our room was ALSO INFESTED!! </div><div align="left">How fast can you say refund? Just ask the man at the check-in counter. It took about 36 seconds for me to get rooms at the neighboring motel. </div><div align="left">The perk? The rooms were $7 cheaper per night and the pool was 10 degrees warmer! PROPS!! The best part is I could not for the life of me figure out why the cashiers at both motels were acting so meek and overly-cooperative. I wasn't being <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">pissy</span> or disgruntled, and yet they acted as if I had potential to become so. It did not dawn on me until I looked in the mirror of our new motel room. I was wearing <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">my new</span> pink t-shirt. Across the front of it, it says:</div><blockquote><p align="center"><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">I'M A BITCH.</span></strong></p><p align="center"><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">What's your excuse?</span></strong></p></blockquote><p align="left"></p><div align="left"></div><div align="left">On another note... PC and I went out for a nice dinner... some place called "Misty's". Fancy <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">smancy</span> shit. We got Crab patties (delicious). Salad and Clam Chowder (yum yum!). PC got King Crab (<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">MMmmmm</span>) and I got <s>rotten crab pussy on pasta</s> Crab <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Asiago</span>!! *vomits in the waitress's shoe* <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">WTF</span> is that shit?!?! ASS? It smelled bad. It looked bad. And... you guessed it... It tasted like crap!! Not <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">exaggerating</span> here... I made PC try it. The instant it hit his tongue he gagged and spit it on a plate (totally NOT like him!). I asked if I should be polite and he replied, "Hell NO! You ask her what is in it so you never risk tasting that again!" I'd have asked for a refund but the stench was clouding my senses.</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="left">On Saturday, the wedding was (of course) beautiful... but I'm sort of biased! Couldn't help but giggle that flower girl #1 (groom's daughter) made it as far as her mother before freaking out in tears and <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">FG</span> #2 (bride's daughter) made it a third of the way down the aisle before becoming infatuated with her basket and stopped to play. It 1) was adorable, 2) proved "the best laid plans" and 3) reminded me why there's no point in sweating the small stuff.</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">The reception was great. <s>The guest list is a whole different story</s> At least it was for about 65 minutes <s>after that the drinks kicked in and then I have no clue</s> </div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><strong>Drink #1</strong></div><div align="left">I purchased my first drink <s>when I assessed the company I'd be spending 4 hours among</s> while they cut the cake. After being totally SNUBBED by Uncle Auto <s>a man in a coconut bra really shouldn't act "better" than others</s> that drink didn't last long. </div><div align="left"><strong>Drink #2</strong></div><div align="left">I recall telling Cousin Happily Divorced that he was getting old if I was beating him to the second drink! After this, I got the nerve to go talk to relatives who were sitting with EX-relatives. (I admit, I was intentionally being an ass).</div><div align="left"><strong>Drink #3</strong></div><div align="left">I clearly remember Cousin Happily Divorced buying me another drink to celebrate his recent divorce <s>since I'm the only one in HIS family that can happily relate to that</s>. After this drink, I made a point of actually SPEAKING to the Queen's EX-father. I grinned to myself at the fact that I intentionally called him "Dick" over and over again (are you sure your name's Richard? Because you look like a Dick to me!)</div><div align="left"><strong>Drink #4.5</strong></div><div align="left">I vaguely recall PC returning to the table with two drinks. One of which he gave to me and the other he used to refill my cup when I wasn't looking. <s>I am NOT paranoid!</s> At some point after this they kidnapped the bride for a ransom. To which I told her father "They don't know this family to well. We don't NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORISTS!!"</div><div align="left"><strong>Drink #5 (aka Drink #7)</strong></div><div align="left">I ordered one last drink before we left. I swear it was #5, but my relatives were determined that it was closer to #7. <s>What do those drunks know?</s> It's not like my cousin was holding me up. I didn't fall out the front door of the reception hall. I DID find myself intentionally talking to people I hate. But I was still sober enough to walk away telling my cousin "I even hate these people when I'm drunk." </div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">I personally find it <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">hilarious</span> that they are now all scratching their <s>balls</s> heads trying to decide whether I like them or am a hateful bitch. Plus, the one person who wouldn't talk to me (Uncle Auto) looks like a total ass because I made a point of telling them how everyone had spoken to me nicely except him. I think some people there will chalk my "<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_11" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">friendliness</span>" up to my mother being the problem. Other's will chalk it up to my <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_12" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">drunkenness</span>. But in all honestly, I was barely more than tipsy all night. I talked to everyone for the following reasons:</div><ul><li><div align="left">I wanted to make the bride happy. It was her day.</div></li><li><div align="left">I wanted to fuck with their brains.</div></li><li><div align="left">I was taking a survey of "Who's a Total Fuckhead in my Family?" (They're still all fuckheads, but Uncle Auto is the only TOTAL FUCKHEAD!)</div></li><li><div align="left">It was win-win for me. Those who WISH I liked them got fooled. Those who WISH I wouldn't speak to them were uncomfortable. And those who I LOVE were happy that I put forth an effort.</div></li></ul><p align="left">Needless to say, Mission Accomplished!</p><p align="center"><em>In case you are curious, my flavor of the evening was Crown and Coke in 12 oz. glasses wonderfully mixed.</em> </p><p align="left">Props to me because my entire 2009 alcohol <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_13" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">consumption</span> (<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_14" class="blsp-spelling-error">pre</span>-reception) has consisted of 1 <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_15" class="blsp-spelling-error">Pina</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_16" class="blsp-spelling-error">Colada</span> on my birthday. And one bottle of Bud 4 weeks ago. <s>I'm such a LUSH!</s> This many drinks in one night <s>four hours</s> SHOULD have kicked my ass. Fortunately, I am blessed to only get hangovers from <s>one night stands</s> beer and despite being up every hour with a sick kiddo, I was smiling at breakfast at 7:45. (Please note I get bonus points for being up before my two habitually drunk male cousins despite holding my own against their drinking prowess!)</p><p align="left">All in all... Saturday was great! Unfortunately, the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_17" class="blsp-spelling-error">OC</span> caught a cold which she happily shared with the rest of the family. So PC and I were sick Sunday and Monday. Tuesday was uneventful as I worked and napped. Wednesday I vegetated on an extra day off. Thursday was a blur. And here we are at Friday already (now Saturday morning). The week has breezed by and I have accomplished absolutely NADA... (unless you count my reception <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_18" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">havoc</span>)</p><p align="left">Here's wishing you all a wonderful blog-er-ific weekend. I'll see if I can catch up with you all and get back into the swing of things. In the event that I can't, please make a note of the ticker ticking away in the top right corner of my blog. I may be busy next week!</p><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-7720435407619684632009-04-24T10:00:00.002-05:002009-04-24T10:00:01.073-05:00An Important Announcement<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Dear Bloggie,</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">While we at the offices of Blog and Blog Some More are happy to provide you with endless amounts of entertainment and humor, it has come to our attention that <s>desktop computers are not portable</s> we will be forced to shut down this service temporarily.</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">Unfortunately, this is an unforseeable incident, as no one knew <s>that people in my family still valued the sanctity of marriage</s> that we would be unable to service this blog for a couple of days.</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">We hope that you as valued readers will continue to check in <s>over the course of the next 48 hours</s> and make your usual <s>smart assed remarks</s> contributions.</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">Service to this blog should be restored on Monday <s>if our technicians sober up by then</s></div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">Thank you for your valued time and have a wonderful weekend!!</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">Sincerely,</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><em>P.S. In case that was too cryptic for you... My cousin, Horse Before the Cart (aka More Like a Sister to Me than Anyone Else) is getting married on Saturday to a wonderful man (and his daughter). P.C. and I will happily <s>make the rest of the family uncomfortable by our presence</s> be attending and wishing her all the best because <s>she's the only one of us that turned out halfway decent</s> WE LOVE HER!!</em></div><div align="left"><em></em></div><div align="left"><em></em></div><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-65429641562531850682009-04-23T16:53:00.005-05:002009-04-23T17:19:11.478-05:00It's about time for another one?<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">What do you mean... another one?</div><div align="left">oh... Oh... OH HELL NO!!</div><div align="left">Have you people fallen off the sanity wagon and somehow slipped into complete madness?</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">Let me explain!</div><div align="left"><strong>Wednesday</strong> - PAT says, "<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Awwww</span>... she (the O.C.) is getting <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">SOOO</span> big!! It's about time for another one!" To which, P.C. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">boldy</span> proclaimed (in a bluntness that made me want to crawl under our couch!) "Yep, as soon as we get a house bought I'm knocking her up!" Oh... yes... he said that!</div><div align="left"><strong>Today</strong> - My boss, my co-worker, the teacher across the hall, and the nurse all said this exact same statement... "<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Awww</span>... she's almost TWO! Time to have another one!!"</div><div align="left"><strong>Plus</strong>... we all know where The Queen stands on this one... (she wanted another one about 1 year 364 days ago!)</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">What do I look like? You people's personal egg fridge? <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">C'mon</span>!!!</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">I can hear you... "Oh, you know you're just dying to have another one!"... SHUT UP!!</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">No... no... <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">nononono</span>... *throws self on floor in two-year-old tantrum fashion*</div><div align="left">BUT I DON'T <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">WANNNNNNNNNA</span>!!!</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">Yes... I love the O.C.</div><div align="left">Yes... I want more</div><div align="left">However... there is this HUGE and RESOUNDINGLY tear-filled child in me that says the following:</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">1. I hate having to eat all the time (it involves far too much time in a kitchen)</div><div align="left">2. I hate growing enormously fatter by the millisecond</div><div align="left">3. I hate wearing <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">MuMus</span></div><div align="left">4. I hate the exhaustion of carrying an extra 40-some pounds around daily</div><div align="left">5. I hate not being able to shave my legs once a month</div><div align="left">6. I hate not being able to see if my shoes match</div><div align="left">7. I hate having strep throat for 5 months straight</div><div align="left">8. I hate having my tonsils checked THE HARD WAY every month</div><div align="left">9. I hate having everyone under the sun checking out my <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">hoohaw</span> during delivery (like I'm a prize heifer)</div><div align="left">10. I hate "You're looking very pregnant!"</div><div align="left">11. I hate puking at random intervals for no apparent reason</div><div align="left">12. I hate swollen feet, aching backs, and heartburn.</div><div align="left">13. I hate feet in my liver</div><div align="left">14. I hate not sleeping on my stomach</div><div align="left">15. I hate everything about the 6 weeks post-<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">prego</span></div><div align="left">16. I hate being puked on bi-hourly</div><div align="left">17. I hate being pooped on</div><div align="left">18. I hate poop</div><div align="left">19. I hate absolutely every aspect from conception to about 4 months old!</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">That's right... I'm a miserable, bitchy, unholy Anti-Christ of a Pregnant COW!</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left">That being said, the next person who offers me up as a baby factory will be handed an application to be a surrogate and nanny!</div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"><p></p></div><div align="left"><em>P.S. Unfortunately, since there is a limited number of broke crack-whores around here willing to give up their <s>welfare checks</s> children, I will probably be stuck carrying our next child. I will however stage a serious protest and may even stand on the front lawn with a sign that says, "HELL NO! WON'T <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" class="blsp-spelling-error">PREGO</span>!!"</em></div><div align="left"><em><p></em></p></div><div align="left"><em>And no... there's no date set YET! I'm still religiously sucking down little colored pills from the round disc... if I thought it'd be more effective, I'd take them two at a time!</em></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-69163472791665232282009-04-22T21:02:00.002-05:002009-04-22T21:21:46.646-05:00A Day at the Circus!<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">No! I did NOT visit my relatives! We really DID go to the circus!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">So, the very first thing was the juggler! 15-years old and he was awesome! But I kept wondering how many broken lamps I'd have when P.C. tried to do some of those tricks in my livingroom!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Next, was the trapeze girl (age10)! Hanging upside down doing tricks from a hoop to the song... you'll never believe this... "Barbie girl!" My pedaphile alarm went on full alert as I search the stands for creepy guys sitting alone without children! GROSS!! Great act... but GROSS!! For those of you scratching your heads... google "Barbie Girl lyrics" and you'll totally understand why I puked!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">I was a bit concerned about the clown issue because (if you don't already know) I'm terrified of them. But in all honesty, I think he was 12 and I've see Rodeo clowns with better acts.</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">The chick (16?) hanging from the ribbon was really awesome if you disregard the fact that she's weighed 12 pounds soaking wet and did a mid-air split that made my crotch scream in pain!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Swing jumpers... yawn!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Hula hoop chick... oh yes... that was a hoola hoop... on her foot... above her head!!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Fire eaters were awesome!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Floor acrobats? pssh... watch gymnastics!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Magician was cool!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Sponge Bob Square Pants running out to the theme song and then leaving... O... M... G... It's a CULT of little singing children!! SCARY!!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">Chinese dragon/dog costumes (2 people in each) doing tricks on a platform and a giant ball? AWESOME!! Why? Because seeing four people climp on a ball and roll it over a teeter totter is cool enough, but seeing them do the trick while dressed in giant dog costumes... AWESOME!</div><div align="left"><p></div><div align="left">All in all we had a great time... but one question seriously plagues me...</div><div align="left"><strong>"Who inforces the child labor laws?"</strong></div><div align="left">SERIOUS!! I think there were 3 adults in the circus! They claimed it was "The Perez Family" but... um... lets just say that Mr. Perez did not "father" those sorority-clone blond haired, fair-skinned, girls!</div><div align="left">And someone please tell me why the fiber-optic glow stick was $12 dollars (needless to say we settled for a $2 blow up dolphin)? And why P.C. paid $2 for a 12 ounce can of soda? P.C. (aka The Human Calculator) said he was counting up estimated profits off the products he could see being sold ($2 for a balloon!) and he stopped counting at $10,000.</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="left">Hope you all had a wonderful day!!</div><div align="right"> </div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-67504455575555672752009-04-21T20:20:00.005-05:002009-04-22T01:49:02.662-05:00Have I done this one before?<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="right"><em>"Mirror mirror on the door</em></div><div align="right"><em>Have I done this meme before?"</em></div><div align="right"><em><p></em></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right">Well... the mirror <s>might need to be taped back together</s> is giving me the silent treatment. So if I have... it really doesn't matter because it'll be different today than any other time. You know me <s>and my short attention span</s> and my wide spectrum of interests!</div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right">So here goes the Meme (as seen today!)</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>1. Were you named after anyone?</strong></div><div align="right"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Yeppers</span>! I was named after the 11<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> letter in the alphabet! Don't believe me? Just ask the 10<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> letter... she suggested it. Much better name than what the 18<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> letter suggested!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>2. When was the last time you cried?</strong></div><div align="right">Did you read the previous post? YESTERDAY! Okay, in my defense it wasn't really an outright CRY. It was more like a <s>muffled scream</s> LEAK! But yeah, there was a drip and I earned it!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>3. Do you like your handwriting?</strong></div><div align="right">Why yes! I think this font is lovely!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>4. What is your favorite lunch meat?</strong></div><div align="right">Salami. <s>gag</s> Okay... so it WAS my favorite before I O.<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">D'ed</span> on Salami sandwiches in the first 3 months I was pregnant with the O.C. Come to think of it... I don't really like lunch meat any more. Or Burger King (staple of my second trimester!) That might be the reason I packed on <s>48</s> several pounds while PG.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>5. Do you have kids?</strong></div><div align="right">No! I have one toddling terrorist. <s>But I'm convinced that Prince Charming must have cheated on me.</s> If it weren't for the overwhelming evidence <s>like the fact that my liver is now located to the left of my lung</s> I might be able to believe she was someone <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">else's</span> kid</div><div align="right"><p>.</p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>6. If you were another person, would you be friends with you?</strong></div><div align="right">Instinctively I'd say "NO!" I'm not mean, spiteful, dramatic, or otherwise a bad friend. But I'm <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">definitely</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">WACKO</span>! So, yeah... as soon as I'm done with this, I think I'll go reassess my friends because it just became evident to me that they are a bunch of WEIRDOS too!!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>7. Do you use sarcasm?</strong></div><div align="right">I once tried not to say anything that was sarcastic. However, <s>I learned I can't hold my breath for very long. After I regained consciousness,</s> I decided there was nothing wrong with a healthy dose of sarcasm!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>8. Do you still have your tonsils?</strong></div><div align="right">Well, I don't have a mirror handy but the Doctor's never told me I should fine a theft report so I have to assume they're still in there.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><strong>9. Would you bungee jump?</strong></div><div align="right">No. But I would greatly enjoy watching a few people try it with ropes that were about 10 feet too long!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>10. What is your favorite cereal?</strong></div><div align="right">Honey-Nut Donut Seeds!!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?</strong></div><div align="right">That would be <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">awkward</span>! I'd look pretty silly trying to untie my flip flops, high heels, mules, clogs, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">crocs</span>, and otherwise <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" class="blsp-spelling-error">laceless</span> shoes! Here's a better question... do shoes with laces feel superior to other shoes for the extra attention?</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>What happened to #12?</strong></div><div align="right">He was standing too close to #13! Very unlucky!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>13. What is your favorite ice cream?</strong></div><div align="right">Ben & Jerry's Half Baked! <s>brings back fond memories of burning the marijuana in the pastures</s> Because who doesn't love pasting pint size cartons of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_11" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">ice cream</span>, cookie dough and fudge brownie to the cheeks of their ass?</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>14. What is the first thing you notice about people?</strong></div><div align="right"><s>Whether or not they are wearing clothes!</s> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_12" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Intelligence</span> and Sense of Humor. I promise if you've ever spoke to me that I can tell in 60 second whether or not you have some type of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_13" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">intelligent</span> thought process in your brain or whether you're a mindless clone of social expectations. I can also tell if you have any type of funny bone in your skeletal system. How do I know so quickly? If you're an ignorant amoeba, 60 seconds is plenty of time for me to say something that pisses you off. If you don't like my sense of humor, within 60 seconds you will either look at me like I've grown another head or you'll storm off mad!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>15. Red or pink?</strong></div><div align="right">Have you talked to your doctor about this? It might be serious!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>16. What is the least favorite thing about yourself?</strong></div><div align="right"><s>My biological father.</s>I'm pretty content with who I am. If I had to choose one thing, I'd say my <s>boobs</s> teeth.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>17. Who do you miss the most?</strong></div><div align="right">Mom & Dad of course! 3 more days until we see them again!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>18. Do you want everyone to complete this list?</strong></div><div align="right">Only if they're up to wasting some time and making me giggle!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>19. What color pants and shoes are you wearing?</strong></div><div align="right">For the next 15 <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_14" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">minutes</span> and 32 seconds I'll be wearing grey slacks and invisible shoes. After that <s>I'm stripping naked</s> I'm putting on my pajamas.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>How many times do I have to tell these numbers to stay away from that #13. She's a bad seed!!</strong></div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>21. What are you listening to right now?</strong></div><div align="right">"Rocking Into the Night" by .38 Special with background <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_15" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">accompaniment</span> brought to you by <em>Over the Hedge</em> from the O.C.'s bedroom.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>22. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?</strong></div><div align="right">Take the whole box and microwave it!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>23. Favorite smells?</strong></div><div align="right">Alfalfa and fresh rain. Is there such a smell as "<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_16" class="blsp-spelling-error">unfresh</span> rain"?</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>24. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?</strong></div><div align="right">The Queen</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>25. Do you like the person who sent this to you?</strong></div><div align="right">Well, since <a href="http://michellegillsphotography.blogspot.com/">she </a>commented on my post and she doesn't seem to fall into the categories of Ignorant or Humorless... I'd have to say yes!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>26. Favorite sports to watch?</strong></div><div align="right">You know that channel with the Japanese host and the translated commentary where they try to get through the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_17" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">obstacle</span> course? Yeah!! LOVE IT!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>27. Hair color?</strong></div><div align="right">Reddish <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_18" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">blond</span>.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>27b. Colors it HAS been?</strong></div><div align="right">Black, Blackish-purple, Blackish-blue, Glow-in-the-dark green (you should know the glow-in-the-dark gel inside toys and badges smells very bad and cannot be easily washed out of your hair!)every shade of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_19" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Blond</span>, Hunter Orange, every shade of Red/<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_20" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Burgundy</span>, and Hot Pink!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>27c. Places you have died your hair!</strong></div><div align="right">*While <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_21" class="blsp-spelling-error">cruisin</span>' the strip *While shopping *In a department store bathroom *a Gas Station *a Hair Salon (duh right? WRONG! Let me explain. I did NOT hire them to dye my hair. I walked into their salon with a dye job already in the process and asked to use their sink because I was overdue for a rinse!)</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>28. Eye color?</strong></div><div align="right">Genetically Dominant Blue (look it up, blue is a recessive gene yet I have 5 blue-eyed siblings from 5 different dark-eyed mothers!)</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>29. Do you wear contacts?</strong></div><div align="right">When I'm in the mood to <s>stab my eyes out with rusty nails</s> put them in. But generally no.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>30. Favorite food?</strong></div><div align="right">1/2-gallon of my Mom's goulash. Anything less than 1/2-gallon and it's just not worth sparking my appetite!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>31. Scary movies or happy endings?</strong></div><div align="right">Apples and Oranges!! <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_22" class="blsp-spelling-error">GEEZE</span>!! A happy movie should end happy! A scary movie should end scary! And I don't mean the "grabs the ankle from the grave" make-me-yawn suspenseful scary! I mean, "you think they got away from the bad guys until the motorcycle stops on a well- lit highway and you realize they drove into a thin wire at 50MPH!" Yep! I'm a sicko!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>32. Last movie you watched?</strong></div><div align="right"><em>Haunting in Connecticut</em>... and in my opinion... not that scary!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>33. What color shirt are you wearing?</strong></div><div align="right">Grey with a yellow tartan print on it. Another $4.99 special at SEARS!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>34. Summer or winter?</strong></div><div align="right">SUMMER! How dare you use such a horribly "W-word" in my <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_23" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">presence</span>!! You are officially off my <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_24" class="blsp-spelling-error">Fav</span>-5!!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>35. Hugs or kisses?</strong></div><div align="right">Hugs... and for a very good reason. You can still hug a two-year old who has just munched down on a handful of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_25" class="blsp-spelling-error">OREOS</span>!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_26" class="blsp-spelling-error">OMG</span>!! They got the #36 too!!! The HUMANITY!!</strong></div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>37. Most likely to respond?</strong></div><div align="right">The Queen</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>38. Least likely to respond?</strong></div><div align="right">The Queen</div><div align="right">(I'd say my odds are 50/50 on this one!)</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>39. What book are you reading now?</strong></div><div align="right"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_27" class="blsp-spelling-error">Ahhh</span>... now you're going to make me get up because I don't know the title. <s>Honestly, I've had it for a week and haven't started it yet!</s> It's called <em>Secret Vampire</em> by L.J. Smith.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>40. What is on your <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_28" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">mouse pad</span>?</strong></div><div align="right">The name of my cable company! <s>It's the only service they've offered that never malfunctions!</s></div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>41. What did you watch on t.v. last night?</strong></div><div align="right">Scrubs</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>42. Favorite sounds?</strong></div><div align="right">Silence... I think... It's been so long I don't really remember!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>43. Rolling Stones or Beatles?</strong></div><div align="right"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_29" class="blsp-spelling-error">Ummm</span>... I'm gonna say... PURPLE!! Wrong genre, wrong generation!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>44. What is the farthest you've been away from home?</strong></div><div align="right">Sandy beaches, somewhere in the Caribbean, with turquoise water and beautiful Cabana boys serving perfect cocktails. But then I woke up!!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>45. Do you have a special talent?</strong></div><div align="right">Several... but currently, I'm more impressed with your attention span. If you're still reading you deserve an award!!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>46 Where were you born?</strong></div><div align="right">I don't know because my space ship was destroyed in the crash! And The Queen <s>couldn't afford</s> didn't find a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_30" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">refrigerator</span> box until I was 20.</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>47. Whose answers are you looking forward to getting back?</strong></div><div align="right">Whomever can make me laugh! Or is that "whoever"? Reason #327 why I can't teach English!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"><strong>48. How did you meet your spouse/significant other?</strong></div><div align="right">Carpooling to work!</div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-63915666592391714462009-04-20T20:21:00.006-05:002009-04-21T00:15:20.226-05:00Self Portrait #2 (An Afterthought)<s>I was so infatuated with the last picture I shared that I had to share more.</s><br /><a href="http://lifebythecreek.blogspot.com/">Pam D</a> suggested I compile my self portraits and show them off.<br />So, I <s>swooned</s> skimmed through my <s>masterpieces</s> snapshots and threw together a collage of <s>the magnificence that is me</s> random shots. 25 to be exact! There's a couple neat ones in here to point out.<br /><br /><ul><li>4th row down in the middle was taken just hours before I found out I was PG with the OC!</li><li>The 5 red pictures (four corners and middle) were taken at 33 weeks prego when I was in desperate need of <s>being convinced I hadn't magically transformed into a giant troll-like hippo overnight</s> <s>a wide load sign</s> <s>an epidural</s> <s>a tequila shot</s> reassurance that <strong>Pregnant</strong> is still <strong>Beautiful</strong>!!</li><li>Middle row, 4th column is the inspiration for this sites header.</li><li>The oldest picture is bottom row, 2nd column. It's PRE-OC!</li></ul><p><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Se0ut3q6lUI/AAAAAAAABYs/3aEOMEfrSjo/s1600-h/collage.gif"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5326948935495817362" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Se0f1VzfmJI/AAAAAAAABYc/LlZyeoGzWBs/s400/collage.jpg" /></a>And just for good measure <s>because I couldn't resist one more fabulous look at myself</s> I thought I'd show off my new shirt. $4.99 at my favorite store (for those of you that don't know... that would be SEARS!) Unfortunately, <s>since I'm utterly stunning in every way</s> I ended up with a shot that <s>showed off my boobs</s> didn't show off my shirt. On the up side, it turned out to be a wonderful portrait. Glasses, no makeup, and worn all day hair!! <s>DAMN I'M SEXY</s></p><p><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 271px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5326951827937572914" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Se0ids_WODI/AAAAAAAABYk/tgv7iairTw4/s400/today.jpg" />And in case you needed more reason to <s>famn over my fabulousness</s> think this is a great picture...</p><p>This is after 3 hours sleep, 6 hours of <s>pretending to work</s> work, and an hour of having a neurologist electrocute and stab me (wish I could strike that part out)!!! Thus the new shirt... it's my reward for not <s>screaming too loudly</s> crying like a baby as I had needles poked in my muscles. I swear, the doctor literally said, "I like doing this test. I'd never let anyone do it to me, but I like doing it!" (NO JOKE!) At which point I called her a masochist and she laughed. It sounded strangely like "MUAHAHAHAHA!!"</p><p>I swear if the <s>crazy Indian Anti-Christ</s> woman had opened her caftan, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse would have rode out in a plague of locusts! At least she had a sense of humor. How crappy would it be to get stabbed by an expressionless ass with no emotion? </p><p>So, while I spend the rest of my evening <s>licking my wounds</s> running around the house in nothing but my new shirt, I hope the rest of you had a better Monday than me.</p><p><em>NOTE: Good news is there is absolutely nothing wrong with me! Okay, well there are a lot of things WRONG with me... but nothing that can be diagnosed by MRI (I learned I'm not clausterphobic), EEG (Yes, there is actual brain function up there), EMG or blood work. Unfortunately, that still leaves me with what has now been labeled "benign twitching" all over my body. ANNOYING to say the very least!</em></p><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><br /><br /><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-2766499731866501592009-04-20T02:17:00.004-05:002009-04-20T02:38:06.347-05:00I ♥ Faces -- Week 15:Self Portrait<center>Call it simple narcissism... after all... I am a PRINCESS!! </center><center>But I have been waiting FOREVER for this week's contest!</center><center></center><center>Why?</center><center><s>Because I'm absolutely obsessed with myself</s> </center><center>Because no one ever takes pictures of me and I don't own a tripod. </center><center>Which means... </center><center><s>I take it upon myself to boost my own ego. </s></center><center>I have to take all of my own pictures at arms reach. </center><center>AND... </center><center><s>Since I totally love making myself look awesome.</s> </center><center>Since I like to change my profile pictures often, I have an entire folder full of "Self Portraits".</center><center>So when it came right down to it...</center><center><s>I was too busy staring at my own reflection to pick the best one.</s></center><center>I had a difficult time choosing since there are so many.</center><center>BUT...</center><center><s>The rules won't let me plaster my beautiful self all over your computer screen</s></center><center>I finally decided this one is FABULOUS!</center><center><p></center><center>The only alterations to this were cropping off an edge <s>because no one wants to see my bathtub</s>, increasing the lighting <s>to erase a few imperfections</s> and adding some warmth <s>so it at least appears I have some pigment to my transparent flesh</s></center><center><p></center><center>It happens to be one of my favorites!</center><center><p></center><center></center><center><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 314px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5326670282418781842" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SewiZmMzfpI/AAAAAAAABYU/0dCT0JVcw88/s320/portrait.jpg" /></center><center></center><center>Go <s>show off</s> share your "Self Portrait" this week! I know you all have cameras so get to it!!</center><center><a href="http://www.iheartfaces.com/"><img src="http://www.livinglocurto.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/125x125.jpg" /></a></center>P.S. Dear Queen... there's that picture of you in the front yard after you "fixed your haircut" and frankly, if you took it by hand... YOU SHOULD TOTALLY ENTER IT BECAUSE IT'S AWESOME!!<br /><br /><br /><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="left"></div><br /><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><br /><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com40tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-78556284569530597032009-04-19T01:39:00.004-05:002009-04-19T03:57:36.807-05:00Flash is AWESOME!!<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="right">See that thing ^^^^^ (I hope it loads for you!)</div><div align="right"></div><div align="right">It's my new toy! I actually made it as a new header, but it's way too much work right now to set the whole thing up... but seriously... play around with it... it's awesome. You can click the OC or Queen to go to their sites. I'm going to have a blast with this new toy. I had to shrink it for now b/c like I said... too much work to set it all up tonight.</div><div align="right"></div><div align="right">So let me know if it works. Let me know if you like it or hate it. Check out their site and play around. You won't be able to make one this small unless you know a bit of html to shrink the height and width... but seriously... check it out and let me know what you think.</div><div align="right"></div><div align="right">Nighty nite!</div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><p></p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right">P.S. I soooo didn't go to bed like I should. I was too excited playing with the new toy. So go check out what I made... I plan to do more with this in the future! Let me know what you think!! It's early morning now... I'm going to bed.</div><div align="right"> </div><div align="right"><a href="http://theroyalbloggers.blogspot.com/">CHECK IT OUT WHILE I'M SLEEPING</a></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" border="0" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" height="90" /></a> </div><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-71378346568230726192009-04-18T01:00:00.004-05:002009-04-18T01:05:16.854-05:00For the Queen<div align="center"></div><div align="center">Okay... since you deleted your follower widget I was worried b/c you can't get followers now.</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">So here's what you do...</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5325907556955218674" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 150px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 123px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SelstIbiYvI/AAAAAAAABYM/hXeil2DN3Eg/s320/follow.gif" border="0" /></div><ol><li><div align="center">Take this Button and save to your computer.</div></li><li><div align="center">Add the followers back on</div></li><li><div align="center">Log out</div></li><li><div align="center">Go to your page (logged out)</div></li><li><div align="center">Click Follow (as if you wanted to follow yourself)</div></li><li><div align="center">Copy the link for the window that opens.</div></li><li><div align="center">Log back in.</div></li><li><div align="center">Add the button image as a picture. Link it to the "copied link".</div></li><li><div align="center">Save</div></li></ol><p align="center">That should work. If not, it was worth a shot!</p><p align="center">Loves and g'nite!</p><br /><div align="right"></div><br /><div align="right"></div><br /><div align="right"></div><br /><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div><br /><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-65207124151064593542009-04-13T21:02:00.004-05:002009-04-13T21:09:49.198-05:00Happy After Easter!!<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SePu419nJ8I/AAAAAAAABYE/xtI8Q0bcZNk/s1600-h/eggs.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5324361844807641026" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 242px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 172px" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SePu419nJ8I/AAAAAAAABYE/xtI8Q0bcZNk/s320/eggs.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><div align="left"></div>According to the package... The proper serving size of these is 12 pieces. Each bag contains about 9 servings. Each serving contains 180 calories.<br /><br />By my calculations, I CAN eat an entire bag of these!! I will only be consuming 1620 calories (the daily recommendation is 2000 right?)<br /><br />I will only be getting three times my recommended Saturated Fats, 36% of my sodium, 72% of my carbs. Plus... there's no risk in overdosing on healthy vitamins like Calcium or Iron!!<br /><br />As a bonus, I'll be getting ZERO cholesterol, 36% of my dietary fiber and 36 grams of protein... which in my book indicates these are GOOD FOR YOU!!<br /><br /><div align="left"></div>So... thank you very much CHRIS!! I'll be going to work tomorrow with mini-eggs glued to my butt!! I hope you have nightmares about PEEPS!!<br /><br /><div align="left"></div><br /><br /><div align="right"></div><br /><br /><div align="right"></div><br /><br /><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div><br /><br /><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-27167538997958582952009-04-12T15:20:00.002-05:002009-04-12T16:02:22.244-05:00Easter Tradition<div align="left"><p>Since the birth of my daughter, our family has been all about starting new traditions! I guess there is nothing wrong with the "old" family traditions (I'm sure we've all gotten drunk and passed out in an Easter ham before). It's just that decorating beer bottles with bunny ears and hunting for Uncle Auto's stash isn't really my idea of a kid-friendly Easter.</p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><p>So yesterday the OC and I sat on the front porch and dyed <s>the sidewalk</s> eggs. (check her site for the pictures) This afternoon we put on our pretty Easter dress, did our hair and went outside to find the eggs Mommy hid. Now, the dexterity of a two-year old is limited, so we'll forgive the fact that only 5 eggs survived unbroken. (again, the pictures are on OC's site)</p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><p>But in the "new" tradition of Easter, no one will be passed out drunk on the porch, no one will go to jail, and no hate mail will be sent afterwards (though both OC and Mommy may run around the house in our underwear for the rest of the day since there's no one to impress!)</p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><p>I searched the card isle once again this year, but there is still no Hallmark card which says, "Here's hoping the Easter Bunny crawls up your ass and craps chocolate eggs until they come out your ears!" So I guess there will be no need to mail out cheerful cards to the ex-family!</p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><p>However, I'd still like to send wonderful wishes to all my TRUE family and friends (in otherwards, anyone who can moderate their liquor intake enough that they can still say "Happy Easter") Here's hoping that you have a wonderful time with your family (and/or friends) and if you are unlucky enough to still have people in your life like my ex-family... break out the makeup and paint a bunny face on your brother when he passes out in front of the television with a beer in his hand!</p></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><p>WISHING YOU ALL A HIPPITY HOPPITY FUN-FILLED EASTER!!!</p></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div><p></p><strong></strong>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-41875127558668346412009-04-08T21:39:00.002-05:002009-04-08T22:05:03.960-05:00Back By Popular Demand<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">Okay... a few guidelines before you read this post</div><ol><li><div align="left">This is 100% true story. This is in no way exagerated, embellished or otherwise fluffed up for your entertainment and amusement. These are actual emails that took place between my Uncle and me.</div></li><li><div align="left">Please pee, put down your hot beverage, and place pillows around your chair prior to reading this. I will not be held responsible for accidents or injuries.</div></li><li><div align="left">If this does not make you laugh you need to seek psychiatric help because you are seriously messed up in the head! I mean... I know my sense of humor is hard to get sometimes, but this is no frills, no special effects FUNNY!</div></li></ol><div align="left">I now present to you...</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="center"><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">THE DIARY OF A STAMP</span></strong></div><div align="left"> </div><div align="left">A few years ago when I could stand to speak with certain members of my family without the feeling that a lie detector was buzzing in my ear every 5 minutes, I decided I needed to send a letter to my Grandparents. Unfortunately, I'm lazy. The letters get written. The envelopes get addressed. And months later I find the sealed, stamped envelope at the bottom of a stack of papers. To assure my letter got to my Grandparent's I decided I would email it to my youngest Uncle as he lived 6 blocks away from them. I kindly asked him to deliver it for me. He did so and a few days later I got this message in my email.</div><div align="left"> </div><blockquote><div align="left"><em>Dear Niece,</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>I was more than happy to deliver your note to Ma & Pa. It arrived at our house okay. But, while driving across town, I ran over something that destroyed my tire before flying up and cutting my oil filter. I sat down my beer and changed my tire. Just as I was finishing, a cop pulled up to help. After seeing the open beer bottle, he started asking a lot of questions that I didn't have time, or desire to hear. This is when my friend "Bud" started thinking that we could out run said copper. About a mile down the road, Bud remembered the damaged oil filter. The loud knocking noise was the first hint. Bud and I discovered a Tracker will go about 1.4 miles with no oil. At this time, Bud is thinking, "Cops eat a lot of donuts, I'll bet we can out run him on foot." After only 3 or 4 steps, the nice copper tackled me on the ground. He offered me a ride and gave me some bracelets, so here is your bill for<br />delivering your letter!</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="right"><em>1 tire...................................$ 67.45</em></div><div align="right"><em>1 oil filter............................$ 6.75</em></div><div align="right"><em>1 Motor installed................$1500.01</em></div><div align="right"><em>Bail.....................................$ 300.00</em></div><div align="right"><em>Lawyer...............................$2800.02</em></div><div align="right"><em>Fines...................................$ 700.03</em></div><div align="right"><em>Insurance Increase.............$3500.04</em></div><div align="right"><em>-------------------------------------</em></div><div align="right"><em>Total...................................$8864.30</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>Now, how hard is it to HIT THE PRINT KEY AND BUY A FREAKING STAMP!!!</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="right"><em>Sincerely,</em></div><div align="right"><em>Uncle Auto</em></div></blockquote><div align="left">As you can guess, I could not help but respond accordingly:</div><div align="left"> </div><blockquote><div align="left"><em>Uncle Auto,</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>I have reviewed the bill you sent me very carefully and I have concluded the following:Goodyear tire estimates that the average motorist in North America travels about 12,000 miles each year. The delivery that I requested was appoximately a 1.2 mile drive. Considering that, the mechanical repairs on your vehicle should be reduced to 1/10,000th of the total. (approximately 16 cents) Considering you likely would have driven this distance regardless of whether you were delivering my letter or not, I feel that you are still responsible for 1/2 of the remaining cost. Making me responsible for 8 cents of your mechanical repairs.</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>Now let's address your criminal charges. The way I see it 99% of these charges should be blamed on your friend "Bud", who apparently gave you very ill advise in a time of crisis. Of the remaining 1%, I must hold you 99% responsible for listening to your friend as we all know he doesn't have the best history for good advice. The remaining 1% of that should be equally split between myself and your wife, whom obviously made you drink that beer. Thus, my conclusion in regards to your criminal costs is that Bud should be responsible for $3762.04, You should be responsible for $37.62. The remaining 39 cents should be split between me and your wife, making me responsible for 20 cents.</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>Finally, we will address the matter of your raised insurance in the amount of $3500.04. First, as insurance is based on the driving history of the insured drivers, we must first cut this amount in half and place half of the blame on your wife. This reduces said bill to $1750.02. Next, the way I see it is you have been driving for approximately 30 years which adds up to 10950 days. My letter was involved in just one of these days and therefor I feel I'm only responsible for 1/10950th of your driving history. Using these figures, I estimate that my responsiblity for your insurance costs are 16 cents.</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>The revised bill is as follows:</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="right"><em>1 tire, 1 oil filter, 1 engine installed.............$0.08</em></div><div align="right"><em>bail, lawyer fees, & fines...........................$0.20</em></div><div align="right"><em>raised insurance cost...............................$0.16</em></div><div align="right"><em>------------------------------------------------</em></div><div align="right"><em>Total cost to me.......................................$0.44</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>Now, normally, I make around $9.00 an hour giving advice to students and assisting with problems. Due to the fact that you have done so much free mechanical work for me in the past, I'm going to do you a favor and provide you with equally valuable advice for a flat rate of 44 cents.</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>First, I must recommend that you forget your wife is partially to blame for this misspent adventure and write it off as the price you pay for "marital bliss"</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>Secondly, though I don't think it will do you much good, you should send a bill to your friend "Bud" in the amount of $3762.04 for your criminal costs. Here, I must advise you that Bud is a bad role model for you. He is a bad influence on your fragile sensibilities and he will only lead you to further trouble in the future. Perhaps you should consider cutting all ties with him and find more positive influences in your life. Word on the street is that Bud is a bad guy. He's been seen in the company of many bad characters like Jack, Jose, and even the notorious Mary Jane. More often than not, he seems to be associated with criminal activities world wide. You need to find out who you are and stop letting Bud tell you who should be. I know you like Bud and he's fun to be around, but considering your history together I just don't think that he is a very good friend to you. How many nights has Bud spent in jail for you? Think about it.</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="right"><em>Best Wishes, </em></div><div align="right"><em>Princess K</em></div></blockquote><div align="left">Clearly offended, Uncle Auto responded as follows:</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="left"><blockquote><div align="left"><em>Niece,</em></div><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>In a shameless attempt to get out of paying a bill, you have attacked all my friends. After telling them about your comments, there replies were as follows:</em></div><ul><li><div align="left"><em>Mary Jane said, "I need to weed out the bad kin and smoke 'em!"</em></div></li><li><div align="left"><em>Jose responded with "Senor Rojo been berry berry good!"</em></div></li><li><div align="left"><em>Jack thinks you hate him because he's black!</em></div></li><li><div align="left"><em>Then there's Bud. Bud cannot believe the terrible things you, a fellow horse lover, said about him. He wonders if you realize that a total disassociation with Bud would result in 5 majectic Cleidsdales starving to death? And wonders if you should be teaching our youths.</em></div></li></ul><div align="left"><em></em> </div><div align="left"><em>Till next time,</em></div><div align="left"><em>Uncle Auto</em></div></blockquote></div><div align="left">It was obvious that he was taking my efforts to help him as a personal attack on his friends. Anyone who knows my family can tell you that the only disease that can survive in our bloodstream is alcoholism. Knowing that the bond between him and his friends is very strong (and none of my family would be sobering up for an intervention) I decided to cut my losses and hope I didn't get any collection calls on the matter. No doubt, we are both better off since the severing of family ties. I no longer need to waste stamps or bandwidth on letters and Uncle Auto can no longer blame me for his misadventures.</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="left">Now you all understand why I'm so messed up in the head. Be sympathetic with me.</div><div align="right"> </div><div align="right"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div><p></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-70119691951786601632009-04-07T21:31:00.002-05:002009-04-07T21:42:50.698-05:00Heheh... I saw it and you have to wait!!<div align="center"></div><div align="center"></div><div align="center">That's right... </div><div align="center">It was illegal</div><div align="center">It was stolen</div><div align="center">It got a guy fired</div><div align="center">The FBI are involved</div><div align="center">And now it's been pulled so you can't see it until May 1st!!</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">SUCKERS!!!</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">BTW... It was great!!</div><div align="center"><a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090407/ap_en_mo/na_us_film_wolverine_leak_1">X-Men Origins: Wolverine</a></div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">Oh... and in case you want to whine about how I'm ruining the industry?</div><div align="center">My $15 clearance/second-hand outfits really don't care if your Gucci shoes and Armani suits have enough company!</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div><p align="center"></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-65454363707867947002009-04-02T14:57:00.003-05:002009-04-02T15:13:00.719-05:00Redo?<div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">The Queen thinks she needs a redo in life. More time with those she loves and less time wasted along the way on things that didn't matter.<br /></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">I must remind her... a redo changes everything!</div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><ul><li><div align="left">Take away the bad and you would never be the "better person" that you are today.</div></li><li><div align="left">Add more time with those you love and risk adding bad memories and potentially losing those wonderful moments you cherish!</div></li><li><div align="left">More money, a different job, a better education... all of these things would change the path that you chose in life.</div></li><li><div align="left">Remove the "bad" people and you may never have met the wonderful people you hold dear.</div></li></ul><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">So I honestly admit, while I've made my fair share of mistakes and errors along the way. And there are people I wish I had given less and people I'd love to give more... I would never be willing to spin that "Redo Roulette Wheel" and risk losing the good things in the hopes of something better.<br /></div><p align="center"><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/kkWGwY5nq7A&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/kkWGwY5nq7A&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></p><blockquote><p align="center"><em>I set out on a narrow way many years ago<br />Hoping I would find true love along the broken road<br />But I got lost a time or two<br />Wiped my brow and kept pushing through<br />I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you<br />Every long lost dream lead me to where you are<br />Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars<br />Pointing me on my way into your loving arms<br />This much I know is true<br />That God blessed the broken road<br />That led me straight to you<br />I think about the years I spent just passing through<br /><strong>I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you</strong><br />But you just smile and take my hand<br />You've been there you understand<br />It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true<br />Every long lost dream lead me to where you are<br />Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars<br />Pointing me on my way into your loving arms<br />This much I know is true<br />That God blessed the broken road<br />That led me straight to you<br /></em><br /></p><blockquote><strong><span style="font-size:130%;">That being said... I sure wouldn't mind a redo on the Mexican Enchilladas I had for lunch!!</span></strong></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><div align="center"></div><div align="center"></div><div align="center"></div><div align="center"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div><p></p></blockquote>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-6152204975390681782009-04-01T19:04:00.003-05:002009-04-01T19:09:51.028-05:00Love From Paris!!<div align="center"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SdQBLg0YE3I/AAAAAAAABSE/vTi8LA-Av8o/s1600-h/loveinparis.gif"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5319878357131203442" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 267px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SdQBLg0YE3I/AAAAAAAABSE/vTi8LA-Av8o/s400/loveinparis.gif" border="0" /></a> Hahahaha! Like I can afford Paris!! Besides... I just watched "Taken" and... well... no thanks, I'll stick to the safe countries like Croatia, Rowanda, and Iraq!</div><br /><div align="center"></div><br /><div align="center">But you have to admit that Prince Charming and I make a damn cute couple!!</div><br /><div align="center"></div><br /><div align="center">Happy April Fool's!! </div><br /><div align="center"></div><br /><div align="center">Check out the funny Photo Tutorial at iHeartFaces.com</div><a href="http://iheartfaces.blogspot.com/2009/04/tutorial-simple-fixes-for-all-your.html"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5319879426792685410" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 312px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 109px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SdQCJxni_2I/AAAAAAAABSM/-pt8IoiobtY/s400/iHeartFaces.jpg" border="0" /></a> <div align="center"><br /><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div><br /><div align="center"><br /></div><br /><p align="center"></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-79332499582436036052009-03-28T16:31:00.002-05:002009-03-28T16:33:37.461-05:00Nothing much to say!<div align="center"></div><div align="center"></div><div align="center">I know... I know... you're dying to hear from me!</div><div align="center"></div><div align="center">But frankly... it's pretty boring here!</div><div align="center"></div><div align="center">So... to satisfy you're hunger, I'll refer you to my favorite blogger (wink)</div><div align="center"></div><div align="center">The O.C. will happily tell you how her day is going!!</div><p align="center"><a href="http://ogrechild.blogspot.com/" target="_blank"><img alt="Blinkie52" src="http://i733.photobucket.com/albums/ww339/Princess_Designs/OgreChild/logo.gif" /></a></p><p align="center"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </p><p align="center"></p>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-10335470059320240482009-03-25T16:29:00.003-05:002009-03-25T16:31:40.683-05:00I won an Award!!<div align="left"></div><p align="left">Okay... I don't know who got the bright idea of nominating me... but WOOHOO!! Thanks a bunch!!</p><p align="left">I won!</p><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><a title="Blog Awards" href="http://blogofthedayawards.blogspot.com/"><img height="98" alt="Blog Awards Nominee" src="http://quotes.home.worldnet.att.net/blog_small_nominee.jpg" width="201" border="0" /></a><br /><br />That's right... I have awesome friends!!</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="left">Love & Hugs!!</div><div align="left"><a href="http://www.mylivesignature.com/" target="_blank"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BACKGROUND: none transparent scroll repeat 0% 0%; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" src="http://signatures.mylivesignature.com/54487/51/BF35992431F33C05259174079ABBB493.png" /></a> <a href="http://www.glitter-graphics.com/"><img style="WIDTH: 75px; HEIGHT: 71px" height="90" src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/687/687779doa3stdf14.gif" width="101" border="0" /></a> </div>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7748782182774232466.post-43551726970321313142009-03-15T02:01:00.010-05:002009-03-15T02:35:55.517-05:00Artful Inspiration<div align="center"><div align="left">One of my favorite art projects is altering books. Normally I would rather donate a book than destroy it, but when this Reader's Digest came in the mail I couldn't help but picture a wonderful canvas. Some might say that these sketches would look better on a blank piece of paper, but I believe the text adds something wonderful to the pictures. So while you all know I can "trace" images digitally, I thought I'd share some of my hands on work with you :)</div><div align="left"> </div><div align="center"><strong>Woman in a Poncho</strong></div><div align="center">(This is not my favorite, just a sketch playing around with my markers)</div><br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313307925259773010" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 284px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SbypaCtgZFI/AAAAAAAABO8/cjOVgpVOtZU/s400/woman.jpg" border="0" /><br /><strong>Summer Tree</strong><br />(I love the whimsy of this tree. It just makes me beam happiness!)<strong><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313308120726955858" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 281px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Sbypla4g51I/AAAAAAAABPE/Jb8UDRpHrXY/s400/tree.jpg" border="0" /></strong><br /><strong>Fairy Dew Drops</strong><br />(a small sketch on a folded page between the tree and the frog)<img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313308191731888866" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 201px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SbyppjZaMuI/AAAAAAAABPM/S75g4F0kzOY/s400/fairy.jpg" border="0" /><br /><strong>Frog Prince</strong><br />(Yes, I know... he's floating! But I love it!)<strong><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313308395286250642" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 280px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Sbyp1ZsjRJI/AAAAAAAABPU/8zsZzBdyal8/s400/frog.jpg" border="0" /></strong><br /><strong>Roses Cannot Know True Love</strong><br />(The verse is original. I never did get why roses stand for love. I think love should be represented by something more hearty... like... I dunno... thistles!)<img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313308586900362082" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 279px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SbyqAjg6k2I/AAAAAAAABPc/bH9V-EF9dZg/s400/rose.jpg" border="0" /><br /><strong>Pity for Humanity</strong><br />(I love this angel and have drawn her many times. My favorite is one with broken stained-glass wings.)<img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313308765724234786" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 284px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SbyqK9r2VCI/AAAAAAAABPk/lMEqQKcVa48/s400/angel.jpg" border="0" /><br /><strong>Mother Earth</strong><br />(This turned out far better than I expected when I started. I think I'll write some verse in silver on the black area.)<strong><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313308920247004274" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 269px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/SbyqT9U8rHI/AAAAAAAABPs/aPl3r3Vjqbo/s400/motherearth.jpg" border="0" /></strong><br /><strong>Sleeping Buddha</strong><br />(I'm debating on whether to use silver to fill in the buddha. I love the look, he just doesn't stand out the way I'd like. Maybe even a quote in the outer circle.)<img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313309070075761554" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 281px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FMj19X6sHgY/Sbyqcre6E5I/AAAAAAAABP0/0vMsE0YI2k0/s400/buddha.jpg" border="0" /><br /></div>Major.Sunshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18302450586278684848noreply@blogger.com7